Mum, you would be proud soooo of me!

Dear Mum,

Am very sorry that I have not written for so long. Well you know lah, I prefer to “story” you directly, then I can add in all the sound effects and the drama gets better! But today I have to settle for just typing them down je lah. Not that I really have much of a choice anyway..

Saturday went quite well, I think, despite some misgivings. You will be proud to know that I behaved myself! And very well, I must say. Although there were times when I was really tempted to explode – who in their right minds would accept “Congratulations on your new Mum” when I already have one? New? Did we just buy her off a supermarket shelf or something ? You mean we can actually get NEW Mums? (I know that first-time mothers who had just given birth are called New Mums, but that’s a different story la kan) Hey, just because Dad has a new wife, that doesn’t automatically make her my NEW Mum. Hmm somehow it doesn’t sound right.. oh yeah, but I held my own and graciously replied with “Que sera Sera”….and a grin! I doubt that many would not understand that one, eh? Or understand it even.. hehehe

I took a really lonnnng time getting ready, dressing up for the event. Well, Dad wanted me to play hostess, as you know already, not that I kenal half the people there la kan, the people from the surrounding areas. Adik-beradiks I can do. Thankfully the ratio was like 1:10 with 10 being the number for adik-beradiks. Many of the family couldn’t make it, as coming from KL would be rather difficult and then nak balik pulak dah late night. Nak book hotel kat situ pun, you know lah the limitations kan. Dah la pulak Monday tu holiday, but Perak only! This part was where I was a bit sensitive when orang tanya.. eh apasal nak balik Ahad jugak? And I sweetly answered “Abis cucu kan semua kat KL.. Monday sekolah kan?”. And to the remark that “Laaaaa you look exactly like your Mum!” hehehe compliment tu, Mum, that made it pretty clear everybody remembers you, rest assured! Well, and THAT was also pretty much why I didn’t make an earlier appearance to greet the 400-odd guests! But then again, it DID too contribute to a much grander entrance hahaha.

I wore a black kebaya with gold-ish kerawang, with the gold diamond kerongsang, of course! Oh and kain batik with sequins (uggh. Yeah, I know, I know) Didn’t have time to ikat any of your batik lepas, I would have loved to have done that though. Then a lot more people would be shocked to see me (you). The kain batik that I wore was already sewn - I bought it ready made. I remember watching you ikat the batik lepas dulu whenever you were going out to a function with Dad.. the sanggul and then the kebaya pendek sulam. And how you used to scold me when I re-enacted you dressing up – doing up a French bun, pulling the sarong to tighten it and finally putting on the baju and the pins hahaha but you enjoyed my little dramas and over-acting, I know . Oh yes, before the baju was the eyeliner and lipstick. Last baru baju kebaya. And the corset-girdle or whatever it was called, too. I can only maintain the eyeliner – can’t leave, won’t leave home without it. After all, I have been wearing eyeliner since I could walk! I don’t need a security blanket or pacifier, eyeliners are more vogue! Oh and did I tell you someone asked if I was protesting, since I wore black? To which I replied, sweetly as always, “Oh this is so I can show off all of Mum’s old jewellery!” Hahaha. You really should have been around to see their faces. Splatt.

The DJ (yes, for the life of me I couldn’t figure out why there was one as it was so inappropriate) started to spin and loudly commented on the ceremony, guests, lights, plates, food and everything under the sun, to which I promptly despatched Abang Atan (yay!!!) to go and silence him before I went to shut him up myself, with some violent actions! Anyway he went quiet but started up again when the lights died. Hmmm this time, I did go over and threatened to shoot his brains out if he was going to turn the event into a stupid circus. Well, that was what I WANTED to do, but I AM your very well-behaved daughter and was not about to create a scene; besides which I didn’t have a gun anyway. Bummer. Now THAT would have been fun!

So all in all I think it went quite well. The newbie was friendly; she wasn’t obtrusive at all and let me have my lights and glamour! Oh well, I knew some people were surprised that I had not kicked up a major fuss (apparently I was entitled to, what a waste that I did not know of it!), seeing that I was the only daughter left, the youngest in the family AND plus the fact that I had not met her until that evening itself! Oh well, in order to make the event move-flow-whatever, nicely, and to SHOW that I was sane in mind and knew perfectly what was going on around me, I told Dad I’d take charge of the moneys involved in the customary gift. And I worked very well within budget too, with a lot of help from some very good friends. (Remember my friends from school, Mum? The boarding school ones lah. The ones I was so engrossed with on the first day of school that I didn’t bother crying when you left me there, when you were bawling your eyes out driving away with Dad in the car.. hee hee sorry Mum) They are still a bunch of very good friends, my sisters, and I am proud to state that you also managed to have met them and enjoy their (then) silliness. Shhh, Mum, don’t tell them I said silly ok, but we were, back then, all of us, and fun to boot! You would be very pleased to know that my friends have all grown up to be fine ladies with professions to be proud of, they manage homes, families, companies, hospitals, the army, the internet, the traffic (both on the ground and in the air, mind you) and fight for what we believe is right. Excellent people, you know.. and they are MY friends !!!

Ooh, I started talking about the Newbie and I veered off towards my favourite subject, ME! Oh well, SHE is OK I guess, of course expectations are never one-sided. But you know Dad. What, 65 years? Hehehe you loved complaining to me about his negative traits, simply because you wanted to announce the fact that you have been together for sooooo very long. Don’t think I didn’t know that trick! I can always spot them from a mile off, remember ? And this is not just about Dad and us adjusting to her, it is also about her accepting us all as we are, as we always have been. It always has to work both ways, kan? Well, as I have been saying every time, “Que Sera Sera” (I also remember you singing that song). My take on this all is to ADD to memories and adventures of our family’s life, not to remove and replace. There is no replacement as there never can be. And to compete with something that has already been, is simply pointless. New expectations can be set, but of course within reason. Easier said than done, I know, but I think you do see my point kan? No need and reason for theatrics lah in this case, ye tak? Buang karan je nanti pun..

Err, Mum, my fingers are now rather sore from the typing... so I hope you don’t mind if I stop here for now. There are definitely a lot more I want to tell you about, but I would probably write another time. So for now, just rest assured that everything will be fine, so not to worry. It just needs a bit of adjustment and changing the status quo from denial.com to acceptance.com. Don’t worry if you think I’m not speaking proper English again, this is just me being playful. Which as always is what I enjoy when telling you stories. I miss doing that you know, telling you stories, exaggerating the scenarios, and hearing you and Nyah laughing and giggling your err, heads, off.. And I will be OK, Mum, InsyaAllah. Really. Don’t worry about me. Worst thing that can happen to me is that I’ll just simply have another nervous breakdown. Hahaha, that was a joke, Mum ! Relax will you?

Bye now, until next time, I love you!